The first time I ever picked up a paintbrush was out of pure
boredom. Home from college for the summer, I had done as many chores as I could
think of and applied to every job opportunity I came across. I called my mother
at work that morning and blurted out the phrase which makes every mother
cringe, “Mom, I’m bored!”
I had never thought of myself as an artistic or creative
person. Sure, I loved writing and could make up stories but that was a lot
different than trying to draw. So, at first, I scoffed a bit. But, my mother
insisted I didn’t have to be good and that it was a good way to squash the boredom. I
decided to give it a try.
By that afternoon, not only had I spent the entire day
painting but I felt markedly different. I felt relaxed and happy- I hadn’t felt
that way at all my first year in college. Come August, it was time for me to return to my dorm room and, this time, I had art supplies to bring with me... my own artwork
to hang on the walls.
It has been over 10 years since then and I still sometimes
struggle with calling myself an artist. I have been involved with art openings,
sold my work to complete strangers, and adorned my own house with so many
paintings, guests asks me where they can find the artist. At one point, I even
posted my work online.
Yet, when someone refers to me as an artist, I still cringe. Just a little. When
trying to decide how much to charge for a work, I struggle with low-balling
myself. "Starving artist" is probably least serious phrase I can use to
describe my hobby because it implies that I haven’t yet “made it”. And to most
people, “making it” is all that really matters.
Afterall, how many people would be willing to spend a
hundred grand on a TELSA if no one had ever heard of Elon Musk or all of the
things he has done?
This is why artists-whether literary, visual, or performing-
give away their art for free. It is why artists undervalue their work and often
don’t want to share their creations with others. We feel like we don’t deserve
the title “Artist” unless we are highly trained, unless we have an incredible
natural talent, and unless we have some significant sales to credit to our name.
But the truth is, those things are not what make you an artist. You are an artist when you make art. You are an artist when you live and breathe it.
I refuse to call myself a starving artist any more because
it implies that I’m not really an artist- and that I don’t deserve to charge
more than a measly fee for my work, my time, my passion, and my talent. I’m not saying I’ll never give away another
painting for free…but I’ll enter those art contests confidently and I’ll
introduce myself proudly.
My name is Katie. I’m a writer and an artist. I’d love to
make something for you!
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